….make lemonade!
No point being sour and puckered up about what happened, find a little sweetness to add and hey presto!
A delicious experience!
2011 has been a rollercoaster of a year.
Sudden highs and dramatic drops – heart stopping – literally!
The Tasmanian adventure in January started with some soul searching and a trip to a hypnotherapy colleague to resolve my reaction to a spiritual event.
My Reiki Master, who is also a Free Priest in the Order of Melchizidek, has been suggesting for many years that she ordain me & I was set to go through with the process, but had a sense of dread as the day approached. My stomach lurched when she described the ordination process & I took this as a pretty good “gut reaction” that it wasn’t going to happen.
In the end I delayed the trip by a couple of days and although we did meet, she continues to express her disappointment that I didn’t go through with it.
Interestingly I lost the Larimar stone from my Lives between Lives session whilst in Hobart.
But I did find an Orb!
The time in Tasmania went quickly and returning to Melbourne at the end of January, it was strange, but nice, not starting school.
A new phase of my life was starting. I had already taken on my room and had been down there part time in 2010, so it was familiar. I was continuing with my studies – a Certificate 4 in Business as part of a Diploma in Life Coaching and had clients scheduled.
An earlier post chronicles the event of February 10th, which has seen my life take a different direction. Priorities changed and moving through the “muddle headedness” was a challenge.
Focusing on completing my studies helped enormously and Spirit provided enough clients each month to pay the rent on the room.
Over the year, I have grown to love my space – looking out onto a grassy area with some trees, there are a couple of magpies that come close to the windows and peer in from time to time and the other tenants always have a cheery greeting.
The space has given my time to pursue some dreams and bring some into reality.
A few new friends were very supportive and this contrasted with the lack of emotional support from family, both around the cardiac event and my change in career.
At this stage I’m going pucker up and have a lemon moment!
After having been a “people pleaser” (or doormat as my friend Susan once famously said) for 30 years in my marriage family, the lack of support has been like a massive slap in the face. ( 🙂 remember I have abandonment issues!!) A pointer to their insularity & as the psychologist I was seeing to deal with the post cardiac anxiety said ” Would you be friends with them if you weren’t married?” I don’t think so, however I am grateful for the clarity that has come from their inaction.
More time out in July as the palpitations continued and it was decided to undergo a Cardiac Ablation. This was very confronting and I nearly didn’t go. The Cardiologist remarked after the procedure that he didn’t expect to find anything and was surprised to find a “rogue circuit” that caused my heart to race at an astounding pace. I have been using hypnotherapy to go into a relaxed healing state daily, along with daily EmWave sessions (which have also shown when I have had arrhythmias). Metaphorically, I have decided to look at the ablation as the opportunity to excise old heart hurts, burning out the old. Reflecting on my lemon moment, perhaps the ablation cut deeper than I thought!
Interestingly a number of clients I have seen over the last 6 months have had cardiac events and being non retirees have struggled with lack of support as well. They do say you attract the clients you need for your own development.
A couple of joint ventures with workshops have been an excellent learning experience and I am grateful to the wonderful women with whom I have worked to present them.
More recently, I ran my first homeopathic workshop and realized that I have a wealth of material which I wrote in 2000 and 2002. Homeopathic manuals that are hyperlinked from remedy to symptom and back again. I’m impressed with what I did then!
Time to set it free from the files where they have been store and share with the world! Book release perhaps!
Focussing on the clinical aspect has been good and now it’s time to move in a more spiritual direction, mixing the clinical and spiritual.
So my New Year’s Resolution is….?
Step into integrity, walk the talk and honour who I am and where I have come from.
I am grateful to the teachers I have had along the way and to wake up every morning to new and wonderful opportunities……so my resolution for 2012 is to show gratitude.