I created this meditation to use with clients who have a strong visual representation. It is designed for the beginner meditator and if you find the music is not to your liking (hard to find music that is can be played without breaking copyright) , just mute it and follow the prompts on the slides.
Friendship spaces
Connection is what matters to us.
It’s one of our core needs.
Focus on Michaelangelo’s famous painting and its the space between the fingers, the expectation of contact or is it release, that is the motif of the painting.
Touch.
The soft, unconditional touch as you caress a newborn child.
Holding a hand with compassion for someone who is ill.
The light touch of a Reiki treatment, and for the practioner sensing the unseen, immeasurable energy.
The sense of anticipation as you reach out for a loved one.
Even the spark of static electricity that some people have (I frequently spark!) as you reach out to touch something….
It was Friedrich Neietzsche who said “Invisible threads are the strongest ties.”
The space between the hands in the photos is like the space between the notes in a piece of music. Invisible, yet strong.
Creating different harmonies as the energy is discharged.
How many ways can you be touched?
It’s not just physical touch.
A piece of music can touch our deepest emotions with its beauty, as too paintings and places in nature.
Friends touch us with their thoughtfulness when we are in need.
We can find friends in unusual places.
They can be around for years or just a little while.
Moving countries or interstate or even into a new neighbourhood, gives us the opportunity to make new friends.
Although I have been resident in Australia for many years, I am privileged to be part of a project to create a warm and inviting Friendship Space for migrant and refugee women in Melbourne.
The friendships that have already formed around this project sustain so many of us in different ways and we are building bridges between those who are familiar with the Australian way of life and the newer arrivals.
Moving on….
As the water flows down the waterfall, so too do emotions flow relentlessly when a parent dies and more so, when it is the last remaining parent and you become an orphan.
Many people are familiar with Elizabeth Kuebler-Ross’ Five Stages of Grief but there are other variables in the process.
Many people would also be familiar with the quotation “No man is an island”, which was a sermon by John Donne in the 16th century.
“No one is self-sufficient; everyone relies on others.”
But what happens if you have a long term partner or spouse?
Can you rely on the in-laws to emotionally support you as you go through your grieving process?
What about friends?
Who would you rely on?
It would be nice to move through the stages Kuebler-Ross outlined with no extraneous factors.
So what if you are feeling bereft of support?
Seeing a Grief Counsellor may help to work through underlying issues that were already in the family dynamic.
Meditation
Daily practice is what gets the results.
Most of the time we have good intentions and start a practice, but all too frequently I hear clients saying that “Something came up” and they couldn’t continue.
It is precisely at those times that a good meditation practice is the most helpful. Through a regular practice of meditation, and it really doesn’t matter what style, it becomes easier to clear the mind at times of stress, access creativity and perceive the world in quite a different way.
3 simple steps to setting up your meditation practice will help you to start your practice.
What can we give them?
What can we give them – who are old and failing
And sometimes weary of the passing years?
Only our tears and sorrow, unavailing.
With memories of past hopes and present fears.
While these our sons go gaily into the battle
We, who so love them, sit and wait in dread-
Of shreiking shell and the machine guns rattle,
All tense with hope – or fear that they be dead.
Our souls, sore wounded, when our loved one dies
Take comfort from the splendour of the skies.
For there, clear eyed, they look serenely down,
From their high vantage ground beyond the stars.
And having borne the Cross may wear the Crown,
And heal them of their travail and their scars.
They’ll tread again the pleasant paths of Heaven,
For Sacrifice is but its widest gate,
And Mercy is the soul of what was given,
Their gallant souls, whose love will vanquish hate.
Bright gifts we bring to England of our pain,
Oh England – England – take them not in vain.
Charles Corner
* Charles Corner was my maternal Great Grandfather and this poem was written for an anthology put together by my Grandmother, Eleanor Harper (nee Corner) and my father as a memorial to Uncle Teddy (Edward) who was a Lancaster bomber pilot who died in WW2.
The wanderer returns home
This is my Dad.
We had our differences when I was growing up and they were pretty full on at times. I left home at 19, but returned annually to catch up with Mum for many years and there was much left unspoken.
Mum died in 1999 and from that year on, Dad travelled over to spend Christmas with my family as my brother went to New Zealand to celebrate the holiday season with his wife’s family.
A bout of bowel cancer slowed him down a little …. and his increasing age, so he decided to sell up his unit in Perth and move to a retirement complex in the outer Melbourne suburbs to be closer to my family.
A difficult decision at 85.
Still a little wary of him, I visited weekly, taking him shopping on a Sunday and we slipped into a routine.
If he needed to go to the doctor, I took him.
The kids liked playing Ludo with him and we shared meals for significant occasions.
Heart attacks, one for him, one for me….
…we muddled along and along the way we became friends… finding that we had similar interests in religion, meditation, reincarnation…..
The kids promised to visit ….and did on occasions, stepping up nobly when we were travelling and taking him out for a special birthday lunch one year.
He turned 90… then 91… it seemed like he was going on forever… then earlier this year, his older brother died, then his sister’s husband. Suddenly he began to talk of the completing this life cycle….he became a little breathless… he fervently completed jumbo crosswords to prove that he wasn’t going senile.. and the chest pains began.
At first I thought it to be a result of greiving for the men he used to know, but the emergency department x-rays showed up what was thought to be pneumonia.
Stubbornly, he insisted he would be alright at home and I assured the doctor I would follow up with the GP.
The tests showed that he had lung cancer.
That was a Thursday. Ever independent, he caught the retirement village bus that afternoon to go and get a haircut and do his shopping.
My brother visited on the Monday, taking some time out from a conference that he was attending, to spend an hour or so with him.
On Tuesday, the pain intensified and an ambulance was called. He spent the afternoon in Emergency and was sent home that evening as he said he didn’t want any intervention.
By the Friday evening of that same week he had been admitted to a hospice for pain management as he was finding it difficult to move from the bed to the bathroom. Still independent, he fell from his bed as he tried to get to the bathroom…
A few days of care and the pain intensified… he hovered between here and the nether worlds….aware of what was happening and telling me about the experience…and on the sixth morning he slipped over to the other side and died peacefully in his sleep……
Stretched like a rubber band
Amazing how a rubber band will return to its shape time and time again.
A rubber band comes in all colours and sizes, thick or thin, large or small….
Stretch it out, use it to bundle together letters, wind it the top of an open bag to seal it, use it to tie up hair, flicked from the end of fingers or rulers by children of all ages – so many uses for such a simple strip of rubber.
Such resilience….but eventually they do snap or break.
I do wonder if they are still made of rubber……
Sometimes there are a series of events in one’s life where the emotions go all “rubbery”. Some could say “pear shaped” but I prefer the simile of the rubber band because it implies that you can stretch yourself towards achieving something worthwhile.
The last few weeks have been a series of challenges and the emotions have been stretched right out, then back to everyday tasks and then quickly stretched again. As my work revolves around stress management, I wonder if I can claim the hours put into these challenges as work experience or continuing education points! I am using the tools that I give to my clients for myself and am finding that most of the time I can remain centred.
Stretches # 1, 2, 3, 6 & 7 revolve around my aging father. 91 (and a half), his health has started to deteriorate.
Noticeably so after his brother in law in the UK passed away just a few weeks prior.
I thought it was grief; unresolved grief residual from Mum’s death. He began to get chest pains and had to be taken to hospital twice by ambulance.
The first visit didn’t resolve anything and the medico’s decided to try him on medication for the heart, which would increase the dizziness he was experiencing. The second trip, this time to a different hospital would reveal that he had pneumonia, according to the xrays taken.
Fiercely independent, he wanted to be discharged and I promised the emergency doctor that he would be followed up by the GP.
More tests – blood and sputum showed no indication of infection, so he went for a CT scan. By this stage, we were having daily visits to various medical establishments and I was using the time productively to catch up on some professional reading, which I probably would have continued to put aside if I was in the office.
More tests – blood and sputum showed no indication of infection, so he went for a CT scan. By this stage, we were having daily visits to various medical establishments and I was using the time productively to catch up on some professional reading, which I probably would have continued to put aside if I was in the office.
Late to the next GP visit – it actually cut the waiting time down to 15 minutes instead of 50, the doctor was unusually serious. The CT scan had revealed what is most likely to be lung cancer and thought to be secondaries from his previous bowel cancer. After hearing the diagnosis, he discussed how he wanted his funeral to go and his last wishes. The following days, he lost his appetite even more and took to his bed on the weekend, whilst still stubbornly insisting that he will be able to look after himself without help.
Stretch #4 was unrelated to my Dad.
A beautiful weekend. A warm Spring day and visitors were over for a BBQ and dip in the pool. My husband likes to potter around the house and garden and although the solar heater had been taking the chill of the water, he thought he might light the big gas heater and give it a little help…. The pilot light was out and he had several goes until the gas lit. As it lit, he singed his hair, eyebrows and burnt his arms. He’s stubborn too… standing with his arms in the laundry sink full of water and smelling of burnt hair, didn’t want to go to the doctor. Even with wet towels wrapped around his arms, still saying he didn’t want to go….. I reckon I’m just as stubborn and I put the bucket in the car, drove him to the nearest emergency department where he was treated by a bemused doctor. The second hospital emergency department in one week for me to visit. Arms finally bandaged, he looked a bit like a mummy in progress, although by Monday he had taken the bandages off because they were irritating him.
Stretch #5 has been a long stretch. Not as long as it could have been though. Our son’s ex-girlfriend texted him a photo of her ultrasound at 21 weeks. At least we only had 20 something weeks to wait. She went into labour on the Monday morning and I picked my son up from work and drove him down to the hospital. He stayed, the phone went flat just as she had started to push, so no more news.
Update: A girl – 4040gms. (8lb 14oz) and the baby & mother visited Dad on Friday before his transfer to the hospice.
Update: A girl – 4040gms. (8lb 14oz) and the baby & mother visited Dad on Friday before his transfer to the hospice.
Stretch # 6 was the visit of the prodigal son. My brother often comes to Melbourne, rarely visits my Dad since he relocated from Perth 6 years ago. Dad’s anxiety rose as the time got +nearer and he asked me to be there as well. My brother arrived, with his daughter. Although she has been studying in Melbourne for the last 2 years, she had not yet been to visit.
Stretch #7 was the rapid decline of my father. Another hospital visit and another return home, this time with strong pain medication to help him. I spent the following day sitting in his unit checking up on him from time to time. Some great conversations with him regarding his transition. He had been seeing colours, ranging from red, white and blue (“very patriotic” he said) to purples and reds and some warm yellows and orange.
He was feeling the presence of my mother and felt like others were popping their heads around the door to call him. We talked of his readiness to go and how every so often he thought he was going, only to be called back at the last minute. He felt he had something to tell me, that was on the tip of his tongue, only to be forgotten at the last minute. His mind remained sharp only to cloud over, in spite of the analgesia, whenever he moved. Eating little, but drinking enough to moisten his mouth every so often, he became quite gaunt. As the day progressed, he dozed on and off, sending me to check his mailbox for news as to whether he had won the Reader’s Digest sweepstakes. He was worrying about how to share it best amongst the 2 families!
Stretch # 8 is yet to occur…………He was transferred to a Hospice last night and is made comfortable, so we are in the middle of this stretch……
At the Crossroads
Are you standing at the mid-life crossroads and wondering about going back to study?
If you know what you want to study, then that’s a start, but if you have been busy with bringing up the family or working to put food on the table, then the choices out there can be overwhelming.
There are a few questions to ask yourself:
- For what purpose am I doing the study?
- What will it get me?
- Is it for pleasure?
- To extend my mind?
- To recreate my job into a vocation?
- What level course do I need/want to do?
- Can I trust the organization that is providing the course to deliver?
As with most big decisions, research is the key.
Firstly, be clear about your purpose in returning to study.
Next, ask another question. “What will it give me in the long-term?”
Sometimes a non accredited, industry specific course, recognized by a peak body is worth more than a course from an RTO and will save your wallet thousands of dollars in the long-term.
Not all providers are equal.
It’s pretty much a case of Caveat Emptor – Latin for “Let the buyer beware”.
It is easy to be seduced by the glittering promises of a course that will enable you to earn a dazzling income – only to find out that you continue to spend your hard-earned dollars on upsizing courses as you reach out to grab yet another carrot dangled in front of you.
Research or shopping around can also save you months of study time. 
The jobs market is full of job seekers who find that they are “over qualified” for the positions they have applied for. When you are starting out, an introductory course or weekend taster, if it is available is a good way to get a feel for the course content or provider.
Some TAFE courses lead to credit transfer points to Certificates, in turn leading to credits for higher qualifications, which can be handy. Sometimes all you need is a Certificate grade course to get entry into a field that you find fulfilling.
A case in point is a client, whom I shall call Beatrice.
Beatrice enjoys studying and the challenges sometimes presented. She qualified as a teacher after leaving school and in between teaching and raising a family of 3 boys, she managed to complete her Masters Degree in Education and gain more post-graduate qualifications in librarianship as well as a second Masters Degree in Management.
Her marriage fell apart when she was in her mid 50’s and she needed to return to work full-time to support herself. Interview after interview ….”Too qualified”.
After some Crossroads Coaching , she discovered that what she really wanted to do was to something new and exciting, so she signed up for a Certificate IV in Hospitality with plans to run her own boutique tea house.
The course gave her the skills to move into a different, practical area, quite removed from her teaching experience although her existing time management and people skills are valuable assets.
The coaching gave her the clarity to find out what it was she really wanted to do and the courage to move on.
Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life
Confucius
Taking care of your Etheric self
Everyone has energy fields around them, and unfortunately, some people’s energy fields will impinge on you.
This may be unintentional or deliberate.
When working with clients and associates, it is important to set an intent to keep yourself safe and healthy.
This may be unintentional or deliberate.
When working with clients and associates, it is important to set an intent to keep yourself safe and healthy.
Understanding the Energy system and its many layers will enable you to stay balanced.
If the body is balanced, this includes the physical, metabolic, mental, emotional and spiritual aspects, then the Aura or energy field surrounding the body will be strong and in harmony.
Being “Centred” then is to be aligned in all these areas. If you are scattered or engage in toxic behaviours/habits, then it will be harder to be well defended against other energy fields.
Meridians and Nadis are the emotional and physical pathways that form part of the energy storage system that we all have, and are the conduit that extends between, through and around the Aura and Chakras. Meridians deal with the physical dysfunctions and the Nadis transmit emotional, psychological and spiritual issues.
The Chakras are “energy doorways” that go through the Auric Field which has a further 7 layers which are connected through the Chakras. Any dysfunction starts out in the Auric Field and will flow back into the physical body.
Energetic dirt, which can even be ill will directed at you by someone else, will get trapped in the Auric Field.
The Auric Field
The Etheric is the densest and is often a grey/blue bio energy and is associated with the Base Chakra, seen close to the body (about 2-3cm)
The Emotional field will be multi coloured and with each emotion experienced will show up as a
different colour and with its own frequency. It is associated with the 2nd Chakra and your inner feelings and is about 7 -10 cm away from the body.
The Mental field will be seen as a soft yellow/orange colour, more noticeable in people who do intellectual work and is connected to the Solar Plexus Chakra. It extends some 20cm out from the body.
The Heart field is part of the causal realm, where all information and energy passes through, connecting the lower and higher vibrational layers. It is multicoloured, depending on the physical, emotional and mental vibrations and extends up to 30cm out from the physical body. It is connected to the Heart Chakra.
The Etheric blueprint is where we can heal and restore the physical body. The Throat Chakra is linked to it and it will appear as a blue, web like structure some 20-60cm around the body.
The Celestial layer is connected to the Third Eye and allows us to access our intuition and link to client thought and feelings. There is no particular colour, but it appears as light 30-90cm out from the physical body.
The final layer is the Ketheric layer which contains our life plan or soul contracts. It will extend to about a metre out from the body and is linked to the Crown Chakra.
The graphic below explains what is called the “Step Down” of energy.
Under Attack
Cords, Darts and Dirt
Cords are the result of energy exchange between you and another person and will lodge in the Chakras.
Darts are sudden, sharp, stabbing pains and are lodged in the Aura.
Dirt is the yukky energy often felt in crowded places such as shopping centres.
There are specific removal techniques for each of these as well as general energy treatments such as Polarity Therapy and EMF Balancing Technique – both of which I offer as a therapy.
Attachments
Can be elementals such as pixies, faeries or sprites and generally have a childish, naughty feel to them. More of a nuisance than a threat.
Ghosts are entities that have chosen not to go to the light or have not yet recognised that they are dead and remain earthbound. They are not highly evolved souls.
Walk ins are spirits that are opportunistic and will use a physical body for their own means or entertainment. They can be multi generational or from past lives and generally are looking to bypass re-birth.
Psychic Vampires – These are individuals that will seek out energy from others. They will “cord” you to access your energy. Remaining grounded and balanced will help contain your own energy. Regular cleansing and cord removal will negate their influence. Sonia Choquette has some excellent articles on how to negate their influence and a quick Google search will turn up many more articles.
Well meaning Healers who have not asked your Higher Self for permission to work can also impact on your energy system and is a form of attack. If you are a healer, then ensure that your energy is contained and doesn’t intrude on others. You can set the intent to reject any unsolicited healing – a bit like being on the spiritual Do Not Call register!
Sorting it out
Learn to protect yourself through grounding and cleansing and this should be done regularly.Daily at a minimum, more if you are around different energies.
Use your morning shower to cleanse both your physical and astral body, by imagining the water washing your aura and carrying away any astral dirt.
Using Sandalwood soap will also help.
Ground daily – more if you are around people with unbalanced energy. This is done to bring energy away from the past, away from the future into the “here and now”.
Create a clear intent to create a strong and healthy energy field.
Imagine, sense or feel the red of your Base Chakra, then connect strongly with the earth from this Chakra. You can use single or multiple threads, roots, cords – as you wish to connect your energy to that of the Earth.
When done, seal with gold light, as Gold has a higher vibrational level, to keep safe and pour this energy into and over your body so that you can still remain connected with your loved ones. A lovely visualization is to imagine this gold energy flowing over each of your etheric layers. You can use coloured light, such as the violet flame to transmute negative energy or green for healing.
Sealing with white light attracts more attention from the spiritual realm and can result in more dysfunction, such as Chronic Fatigue.
If you go looking for the “things that go bump in the night” , you are more likely to find them. You may have noticed that when you are thinking of buying a new car, then you will see that make and model more often than before, because that is where you have focused your attention.
Dear me…..
Preparing for the forthcoming Southern Hemisphere Spring Equinox, I did a meditation in which I asked to see my animal guides.
I was surprised to see a young female deer, she was wild, but physically similar to the deer I encountered on Miyajima and Nara.
Questions came up, such as “Am I standing in fear?”
The rational mind immediately thought of the saying “like a startled deer in the headlights”.
But the sensation within my body was not of fear, it was of calm and peacefulness.
Other questions that came up were:
“Where am I?”
“How is the deer related to me?”
We walked through the meditation together and the next image that came to mind was that of a circular clearing in a woods, surrounded by white trunked trees, just starting to sprout their soft green leaves. We rested together for a while and left this place separately and in our own time.
Coming back to the office, I took a while to review the meditation in light of my recent journeyings into the world of spirit awareness and the questions that came up.
Consulting Dr Google, I found that the meaning of the deer was quite different to what was expected and very interesting. Reflecting on the questions that came up, helped to clarify thoughts about my business direction and motivation.
More questions arose.
Am I coming to terms with the intuition that is becoming stronger?
Am I ready to leave behind what no longer serves?
All these are to be pondered over the next few days as we are in the energy of Ostara .
Not only does this equinox energy start from when it is marked on the calendar (September 21st) but the actual crossing of the sun over the Equator happens on September 23rd at 0.49am EST. Interestly, September 20th marks the last 100 days to the end of the year as well!
Another challenge!