Prejudices, it is well known,are most difficult to eradicate from the heart whose soil has never been loosened or fertilized by education; they grow firm there, firm as weeds among stones.
Prejudices, it is well known,are most difficult to eradicate from the heart whose soil has never been loosened or fertilized by education; they grow firm there, firm as weeds among stones.
As Tony Robbins put so succinctly in his book Awaken the Giant Within,
“Values guide our every decision and, therefore, our destiny. Those who know their values and live by them become the leaders of our society.”
It is helpful to go over and review what our values are from time to time to see if we are heading in the right direction. Occasionally we can discover that we are in conflict with our values and then dig around a little to discover the emotions around the conflict.
One of my values is honesty. There have been times in my life where there has been conflict around this, particularly when I’m self sabotaging my success and I’m not overly proud of repeating the patterns.
Lately the values of honesty, trust and integrity have been coming up for me. Are they one and the same?
I’ll give you a couple of examples:
Firstly, I recently bought a floodlight for the shed up at the retreat. Not overly expensive but with a compact fluorescent globe in it to save on power. I took it up to the retreat and discovered on opening the box that the globe had broken – there had been a small impact to the side of the box which caused the damage. The consensus amongst the gathered people was to take it back to the supplier on return to the city.
“No big deal “,you might say.
I didn’t sleep that night. I woke at one stage and realized that I had opened the box in the store and checked the globe against a shelf of other globes for size and pricing. The globe had been broken in transit…….I felt sick…..
When I mentioned this at breakfast, the group opinion was to take it back anyway and get a new one. Perhaps sensible as the cost of a new globe is more than the assembled floodlight.
I reflected on the night’s lack of sleep and what values and energy I intend to bring to the retreat and decided that I would buy a new globe regardless, and did so on my trip to the local hardware store later that day.
Secondly, a little while ago a woman called for an appointment.
I booked her in and when she arrived, she commented that it was a little further than she expected to drive. I asked her why and she said that when she looked at the website, the address was closer to home.
I had been working on a commission basis at a colleague’s practice and she had found me on that website, not my own. Oops!
I explained the difference and the session proceeded.
As she left she said, “Well you don’t have to tell xxxxx that I came here”…… But with my values, how could I not? (& yes I did tell)
How do others perceive honesty?
Over the past few weeks I have observed that there are many shades of honesty and dishonesty. Layers of trust and distrust all wrapped up in the cloak of integrity…….
For example:
Is it dishonest to keep a $50 note found in a carpark?
How would you know the owner? I remember finding a note when I was a child and my mother taking me to the police station to hand it in. I returned months later and was given the note. Just last year I found a $50 note in a large, city carpark. Most of the other cars had departed and I pocketed the note, using it to pay the carparking and donated the balance to a good will tin at my local bakery.
What if the checkout person didn’t scan an item correctly so that it didn’t record?
Would you go back to pay for that item? Or think that the supermarket makes enough profit anyway or see it as a bonus for your loyalty in shopping there?
What if you went to a therapist and couldn’t use your credit card there? (maybe the internet was down or they didn’t have facilities for credit)
Would you try to pay as promptly as possible through a bank deposit or ignore the invoice? Perhaps you might make excuses that the therapy didn’t work. How would you know it hadn’t worked? Wouldn’t you still be paying for the time that person spent with you? Is the failure to pay, as much breaking the trust the therapist has in you as a lack of trust within yourself?
So does it boil down to honesty or is it integrity?
Susan M Heathfield says “Honesty and trust are central to integrity.”
I see it as a triangle – each side supporting the other and crucial to the strength within. When one is absent the structure no longer exists……
Visible changes are taking place, and whilst the photos aren’t taken in the same spot, this gives a sense of the work that has been done.
It was too hot from December to March to do any slashing of the scrub without creating a fire hazard.
The scrub, commonly called Chinese bush is self seeded and is a fire hazard even when it is wet and green.
It seeds prolifically, and just one plant can produce over a million seeds in a season.
What it does tell us; is that the soil here has either been overgrazed in the past or is depleted in nutrients.
One method of controlling the bush is to overplant the area once it is slashed with a green crop, such as clover – which will smother the emerging seedlings and provide green manure for the soil.
The difficulty in removing this scrub, is that there are also young saplings of gum trees and a couple of varieties of wattle, including Golden Wattle to avoid.
Poison is not an option as we want to develop the property as organically as possible. What has been made apparent, now that the scrub has gone, are the contours of the property. It slopes gently down to the centre of the property, revealing the natural flow of water that feeds the two dams.
Plans for the future include developing much of the area using Permaculture principles.
Another problem is Guildford Grass or Onion Grass and this is prolific in the area of the labyrinth.
Single blades of grass that come up from a bulb and toxic to stock in large quantities.
Not even the kangaroos seem to have a taste for this.
Again, chemical removal is not really an option as it will leave residual poison in the ground for several seasons. Apparently use of a rotary hoe on a regular basis helps to keep it in check and reduce the incidence of re-infestation.
At present, I’m in the process of removing the top layer of soil, with the intention of getting rid of weeds so that I can put a topping on the path.
However the Onion Grass is very resilient and just bends with the shovel, so after reading the agricultural notes about it, am thinking of using a small tilling machine in the area.
This will most likely save time and my back!
In the meantime, work continues and mapping the progress with photos makes for a welcome break from digging.
We want to observe a full year of seasons before commencing any building projects. The first project is to restore the soil and then we can start to plan what plants to put in and where.
Already I am growing some oak seedlings and whilst the trees would not be used or harvested in my lifetime, future generations will have access to them.
I thought it was just a few weeks since the last update and was surprised to find that it has been a couple of months….
There have been a number of projects on the go, the largest being the preparation of a country retreat.
It is being developed as an eco-friendly place and will be very much “back to basics” with an organic/permaculture overlay. With quite a lot of work to do, including fencing and weed removal, it is anticipated that it will take a little while longer before it is officially open to guests.
The scrub being cleared is highly flammable, so not a desirable feature and hopefully it will break down into good mulch.
A labyrinth is under construction in a previously cleared area and should be completed for day visitors to walk in time for the Winter Solstice.
Additional projects underway are:
I wasn’t about to test the depth of the dam waters on a clear summer evening in the bush, but it was pleasant watching the sun go down over the horizon for the last time in 2013.
As the evening lengthened and the first stars made their appearance, the reminiscences of the past year and earlier years began…
Gradually the night sky darkened and unveiled the Southern Cross, the magnificence of the Milky Way and more… Our necks grew tired from leaning backwards in our chairs… satellites, shooting stars…. all glowing brightly in the night before the new moon and the new year.
The only thing missing was the music from Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon…..
Breathe
(Waters, Gilmour, Wright)
Breathe, breathe in the air.
Don’t be afraid to care.
Leave but don’t leave me.
Look around and choose your own ground.
Long you live and high you fly
And smiles you’ll give and tears you’ll cry
And all you touch and all you see
Is all your life will ever be.
Run, rabbit run.
Dig that hole, forget the sun,
And when at last the work is done
Don’t sit down it’s time to dig another one.
For long you live and high you fly
But only if you ride the tide
And balanced on the biggest wave
You race towards an early grave.
This was one of my goals in 2013…. and very happy to say that I can tick that box!
As the cover notes say, it is an easy to read book and I hope that you will buy it and enjoy Chapter 11 !!
It will be formally launched in March 2014 and I would like to offer you a special end of year/pre-launch price …. just click HERE.
Coaching is underway and I have re-visited my values.
This time I approached it a little differently and have set the intent to break through old beliefs that no longer serve. Astounding really, how we can unconsciously hold on to familiar patterns of thought and not realize how that no longer works if we want to make changes.
Coupled with the coaching, I’m doing a marketing course and apart from looking at the ideal client, re-visiting my niche and looking to get my message much clearer than in the past. I now realize that I have been a “Jack of all trades” ( or should that be Jill?) and even though I LOVE doing the Reiki, Polarity Therapy and Homeopathy, it is really the Hypnotherapy that is the passion. Seeing clients literally change in the chair as they access their subconscious and resolve long-term issues is the reward.
There is also the realization that these therapies are just tools to be used and can be applied as needed to empower clients. Less focus on naming the therapies and more on getting resolution for the client. Sometimes it’s difficult to see the wood for the trees… and even though I have done a coaching course and can self coach, a fresh set of eyes will reveal the obvious.
Managing time better is another priority as I reduce the number of projects on the go. It’s all about planning and being more effective as well as setting goals for the future. This will be important as in a couple of weeks I will take possession of a 40 acre property in Northern Victoria. Scheduling the time to maintain it and develop it into a workable retreat will be a challenge, but one I’m up for!
Another project has come to a closure and this will result in a book which will be released in early December. I am a contributing author to a book about women’s health and wellness by some well known Australian identities. I look forward to sharing more news about that very shortly and of course if you want an idea for a Christmas present………..!!
Gradually I am bringing my focus in…..
At the end of October the business registration for BrightLight Specialized Education runs out and after 4 years it is time to let it go. it has served its purpose and is a little too long to use in social media & on the web.
Plus, many people have mistakenly thought that it is about special education – which is about educating people with learning difficulties, whereas the intention behind the word “specialized” was that I was specializing in holistic education. No matter.. the new business name is Balance4Life programs and that’s been running in tandem for just over 2 and half years.
You may have noticed that I have re-badged/re-named this blog to Balance4Life, although It still has the BrightLight domain name. That runs out in November and it is also not being renewed and it will revert to being a wordpress blog. I will continue to post here and add opinions and may eventually change the theme as well, although I do like this one.
Other changes are in the pipeline too….. involving some travel but more about that in a later post.
The past few weeks have slipped by in a bit of a blur….. and suddenly it is mid October!
I decided to sit down and coach myself – taking the time to be honest in my answers and posing what I thought were some pretty good questions.
Starting off with ” What do I want to focus on?” Now there’s an interesting question… having been blessed with the double whammy of mercurial Gemini and (year of the) monkey mind, I am easily distracted by “bright, shiny” things. The conclusion I came to was that I need to focus….. FOCUS. Full stop.
“So how is that a problem for me right now?”
Still feeling tired and muddle-headed from the vaccination reaction, I am aware that my focus has shifted. Yes, I love seeing clients for Hypnotherapy and Coaching, but the marketing and business side of it is exhausting. Time to consolidate my interests, including websites and blogs and perhaps do some outsourcing, giving me time to see more clients, write more material and most importantly, time to stop and smell the roses. But back to FOCUS…… and answering the question….. I find that I am a little lot less patient with myself than with clients. So the problem is staying on task and to do this I need to create a clearer idea of the future. Future clients, future seminars and be more specific.
I did have to chuckle when I went back to my vision board from a few months ago…… there it was…. the request to the universe to have at least 3 weeks off, resting, sleeping in, and having some general “down time”. The universe gave me 5 weeks and the time off wasn’t at a resort or retreat, but home in bed!!
Next question…. “If everything was exactly how I wanted it to be……what would I see? What would I hear? What would I feel? What would I be telling myself?” ………this is being specific!! So I have duly answered those questions and put them into my new vision board. It’s the perfect timing for it with the October Full Moon (& eclipse).
Am I going to tell you what I put down?
Maybe, but not today.
This last week has been a bit of a blur….I’ve been in an altered state due to a raging fever which is the result of a visit to my local doctor.
Harsh words you may say, but it’s cost me time off work, which when you are self employed, costs money …there is no sick leave…
I walked into the rooms on Friday feeling well …all I needed was a referral to another professional……when he found out that I was a new grandmother, said I needed to have a Whooping Cough vaccination. I queried this as I had a bout of this as a child & thought that it would give me immunity.
Apparently not so…but that depends on the doctor you are talking to.
Returning to the office, the receptionist commented on how pale I looked. Putting it down to a busy week, I shrugged it off….
Saturday saw a rash spreading down my right arm …a bit hot & I put it down to the Tetanus component…..
Sunday night or the early hours of Monday morning were a different matter. I woke coughing , unable to catch my breath until I finally threw up a heap of phlegm.
With a workshop scheduled for Monday afternoon , I desperately hoped that this would pass over. I called the surgery to say that I was unwell since the vaccination & they scheduled me in with a different doctor. I was sent for chest X-rays in case it was pneumonia, but heard nothing until Wednesday evening when the practice nurse called to check up in me.
As the results of the X-ray showed clear lungs & because I was still unwell, it was decided that this should be reported as an adverse effect of a vaccine & I am to be contacted in the next day or so by the local hospital.
So, getting back to the title of the post…I have been in a different state of mind this week… The time has come to make some changes & I will be taking down these pages -but keeping the blog posts in the next few days