Category Archives: A Balanced Life

Stretch not Struggle

stretch not struggleSo much has changed since I started this Ten Weeks of Intentions journey. Most of the time it has been a stretch not struggle to get a weekly post up in what started out as an “occasional blog”.

So how do you feel after a stretch?  There are times when we need to stretch, not just physically like a cat, but emotionally. When faced with making a change, there is a conscious and an unconscious response to the impending change.  Conflicting thoughts and emotions result in a struggle as we overthink, filter the information and maybe even jump to negative conclusions about the outcome. An emotional stretch may involve changing habitual actions or thoughts and our inner self talk can often sabotage even the best intentions. A little bit like what we are going through at the moment. This is where you need someone to walk alongside you and cheer you on as you stretch to move out of hibernation and towards setting some goals for our “new normal”.

One way to make reaching your goals a pleasant stretch not struggle, is to use the SMART method of goal setting.   Setting a goal or intention using this formula works. Make the goal or intention Specific, Measurable, Actionable, Realistic, and Timed.

Specific: Write down as much detail as you can about your goal. It helps if you have a genuine belief that the goal can be achieved. ? It helps to create a vision board to focus your attention on the end result and in Reiki classes we have a saying “Where attention goes, energy flows”.

Measurable: How are you going to measure that you have obtained your goal? Trackers are great as you can see your progress.  Start with the end in mind and work backwards to now or when you commit to starting.

Your bank account?  x amount of $ saved per week/fortnight/month

Your ideal weight?  x amount of kilograms/pounds reduced by each week/fortnight/month

Actionable: What are the actions you must take to reach your goal? They can be baby steps or great big scary steps. For example – how many subscriptions do you still have that are being used? Which ones can be suspended so that you can save precious dollars while we are in uncertain times? If you find that you have been making too many trips to the fridge or pantry – what actions must you take to get to your ideal weight? Being honest about food intake/portion sizes or daily activities will help to get you to goal weight.

Realistic: Is your current spending rate going to allow you to save for something special or do you need to economize on certain expenses? If you love a garment that is 3 sizes smaller than you currently are, will you realistically fit into it once social distancing rules have been lifted?

stretch not struggle

Timed:  Mark the date that you want to achieve your goal on the calendar, regardless of social distancing rules.  If the goal is a big one, then it is a great idea to break it down into smaller time frames. Likewise with reducing weight. Adjusting your timeframe to acknowledge that you may have a couple of occasions where there is the likelihood of not reaching your weekly or monthly target, will mean that you are less likely to have a negative self talk session with yourself. Make it a stretch not struggle.

My intention for this week is to reflect on the journey thus far and to use the energy of The Fool from the Rider Waite Tarot to continue journeying on.

The Power of Intention

the power of intentionThe book by the late Dr Wayne Dyer “The Power of Intention”  is an easy read and over the Easter weekend I have delved back into it as a distraction from the current situation. I’m treating social distancing as an opportunity to have a pause from the “normal” and to re-visit many of the books on my shelves as part of my Ten weeks of Intention project.

In an early chapter he writes “Intention is something that I believe we can feel, connect with, know, and trust. It’s an inner awareness that we explicitly feel, and yet at the same time cannot truly describe with words.”  

He says that there are four steps to intention. These are:

  1. Discipline
  2. Wisdom
  3. Love
  4. Surrender

Collectively we can use this time to re-calibrate and use the power of intention to create a draft itinerary for when we can emerge from this hibernation and begin to work in our new normal. The book is packed full of practical strategies to help you with developing your power of intention in a creative way.  It is important to pay attention to your feelings as well as the way you think. A journal is helpful here – so that you can later reflect and notice any recurring themes. It’s well documented that what you focus on is often what you get.

For instance if you are focused on what is scarce in your life, then you will continue to experience scarcity.   Set yourself an intention to change your thoughts and feelings to a more positive mindset. The vibration of your positive thoughts will contribute to a change in the energetic field around you. This will have a ripple effect as the changed energy within you will also be experienced by others. As you continue to work with the power of intention, release any fears as you work towards creating a new and extraordinary lifthe power of intentione.

Apart from reading over the Easter break, I have been planting trees   – with the intention of creating a productive and organic supply of fruit. Every so often I have stopped as I catch a glimpse of something out of the corner of my eye …. I’m sure there are garden fairies watching and I was amused to get this card from the Healing with the Fairies oracle deck by Doreen VirtueYou are now allowing yourself to experience and express your true power. The fairies ask you to affirm, “It is safe for me to be powerful!”

 

The Power of Intention – Learning to co-create your world your way. Dr Wayne W Dyer. Hay House, Carlsbad, California 2004

What gifts can I give myself?

ten weeks of intentionMy intention for this eighth week of intentions is to look at what gifts can I give myself during this time of change. It’s not going to be a physical gift as I am minimizing trips outside of the house. Like many others, I need to have my mind stimulated. With social interaction limited to phone calls and the occasional online call, I am heeding the messages of Mother Nature and beginning my hibernation. However, I do have several bookshelves full of motivational books and a collection of audio courses that I can revisit and revitalize my synapses. Therefore the gift I can give myself is the gift of further or ongoing education!

How interesting is it to re-read a book and discover something you missed the first time? I find this quite remarkable. It seems the passage of time allows the subconscious mind to accept what has been already read and be open to previous deletions.

With the visit of a beautiful Lacewing inside today, I was reminded of the faeries that I used to look for as a child. The gossamer thin, translucent wings with a touch of iridescence…. just what a faerie would have.  As a result, this memory drew me to one of my many Oracle card decks – this time Healing with the Fairies by Doreen Virtue. Lovely artwork and I should use them more often as their energy is very peaceful.

gift of financial flowThe two cards I drew after setting an intention to discover what gifts can I give myself are :

Financial Flow: You have manifested a new sense of abundance in your life. Any financial blocks have successfully been removed, and you are now in the flow of increased prosperity. gifts

 

 

 

Dreams Coming True: Your Heart’s desires are manifesting into reality. The fairies ask that you hold fast to your faith and expect positive outcomes.

Listening To Your Inner Voice

Listening to your inner voiceAmongst my many sets of oracle cards there are a couple of small and often overlooked sets. These were the precursors of the glossy, very artistic cards that abound on the shelves of bookshops and the like.  Listening to your inner voice in these uncertain times can be difficult as the constant stream of information via TV, radio and internet may scramble the messages. Fear will also hinder listening your inner voice. We are hardwired to respond to danger – you would have heard of the flight, fight or freeze responses that our subconscious mind gifts to when faced with a dangerous situation. Fear is like this virus, quietly acquired and infecting our very thought processes until we manifest the symptoms externally.

UnderstandingToday for this 7th week of intention, I reached out to my ancient (last century) container of Angel Cards. Tiny by today’s standards, but in their simplicity – just one word in beautiful calligraphy and a line representation of an angel – I found an antidote to the fear that had crept up on me.  Feeling incredibly stuck as how to best move forward in a time of uncertainty, the Angel Card that I picked from the container was Understanding.  When paired with a randomly selected card from the little purple box that sits next to the Angel Cards, it made more sense.  The subsequent card from Treasures from Tikashi was the Treasure card! I believe that this card has relevance not only to me, but to you as you read this week’s intention.

“Your life has purpose and meaning that you can value and treasure.

It is time to acknowledge your dreams. Listen to your heart and discover what you really  want!

Be prepared to do what it takes to follow your heart, and you will find your treasure!”

My intention for this week is to: spend more time understanding my calling and purpose, by

gracefully exploring my dreams and creating a space to be nurtured in an amazing and transformative way.

Intention

Six Weeks of Intention

Some weeks ago I wrote a post on goal setting to fit into the six weeks of intention, but given the intensity of the past few weeks and the shut down of life as we have known it, I will save it for later.

The last six weeks have flown by and on my regular trips to the retreat I’ve had one or more of the books by James Redfield with me. These have been on my bookshelf for some time and the last time I read them was many years ago. The first in the series is The Celestine Prophecy, then The Tenth Insight follows on from that. This time I am taking my time to read the books and am finding that I have a new understanding. Various passages in The Tenth Insight stand out as particularly relevant to this time,  even though the book was printed in 1997.

Apart from the intention to read more and to study the Oracle/Tarot cards as part of my own spiritual nurturing, I have moved to online and phone consultations. Over the next few weeks you will notice changes on the website that reflect this.

It was with great amusement that after a long and vigorous shuffle of my Healing With The Angels pack that the first card that popped out was Intention, followed by Study and then Divine Timing.

6 weeks of intention

Intention: Your intentions create your experiences. By drawing this card the angels ask you to take an inventory of your expectations. What do you expect to happen today, tomorrow or the future?

Study: You are engaged in learning and study right now. Your angels guide you to take the time to read, listen and grow. This card validates that this is an important time for you to learn new ideas or skills.

Divine Timing: Pay attention to doors that are opening and shutting for you right now. Walk through the doors that open, and learn from the doors that shut. Look for other doors that do open and walk through them with faith and gratitude.

Set Your Inner Compass

Ten weeks of intentionWhat better way to set your inner compass than to draw a card from an oracle deck? I used The Enchanted Map by Colette Baron- Reid and drew Movement. I loved the reading from her booklet: “Movement is also a state of mind. The fog lifts and you now know the actions you need to take. This isn’t the time for fear. Let it go and move forward.”

The imagery on the card is also interesting and poses the question “How long have you been like an ostrich with your head in the sand?” Another interpretation could be awareness of carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. intention and movement

Looking at the card you can see a hot air balloon in the distance – again I was reminded of something – this time the movie “Up”. The young boy has a GPS which in his exuberance to demonstrate its capabilities-  flies out of the window and they have to rely on the wind taking them  to their intended destination. A beautiful metaphor for trusting that you will get to where you want to go to by using your own inner compass.

So my intention for this week is to: set my inner compass to take me to my goals. To have a clear vision and to move forward, setting my fears or unhelpful beliefs into that wicker basket and letting them go.

Create Space

Create spaceFollowing on from last week’s post, once we let go of what no longer serves us, we can create space. Why do we need to create space? Because from energetic and Feng Shui  points of view, clutter is what obstructs the free flow of energy. Clutter that remains can be physical or emotional. Who has a kitchen drawer full of utensils that might be used just occasionally? When was the last time you used that fancy melon baller? If it was longer than six months ago, it is most likely to be clutter.

Setting your intention to clear and create space for the new to come in can be emotionally challenging. I have boxes of books that I inherited from my deceased parents that I open only very occasionally. I admit that they are clutter and in going through them and dispatching them to somewhere where they may be appreciated, I will not only clear some physical space but the emotional attachment from hanging onto them.

In fact, you can physically create space for yourself by finding a pleasant nook in the garden or somewhere in the house that is just yours. Plant some fragrant flowintentioners or a shady shrub with a comfortable space to sit and contemplate. For the interior, decorate your space in colours and furnishings that please you.

This card from the Enchanted Map oracle deck has a beautiful message. ” Deliberate, clear intentions have the power to change your world”.  Colette writes further that “the good intentions of others will inspire you to send out beautiful ones of your own.”

The intention for this week is to: release the need to hold onto things from the past that no longer serve me.

Release What Hasn’t Worked

IntentionBuilding on last week’s intention to focus on a healthier lifestyle, I have started to release what hasn’t worked for me in the past and the current energy of the February New Moon is an ideal time to do this. Building a healthier lifestyle is not only about food, it’s also about mental, emotional and spiritual health. Mentally – it’s checking in on what I’m focusing on. Am I thinking positively or have I got myself into a spiral of negative or unhelpful thoughts? Emotionally – it’s about checking in to make sure I am acting (or re-acting) in an emotionally intelligent manner. Spiritually – am I making time to nurture my soul?

Release what hasn't workedI love the message that this oracle card gives. When you release the negativity and the investment in an outcome, it may seem miraculous, but opportunities open up. You can choose to allow the universe to assist you on a spiritual level or use a coach or therapist to work to remove and release your subconscious beliefs.

A quick look through my vision book from several years ago, showed me that I have been setting goals that haven’t been reached – either because they were too unrealistic or didn’t align with my true purpose or I have unconsciously sabotaged myself in some way.

My intention for this week is to:  Release unhelpful habits and beliefs through coaching with a trusted colleague.

 

Embrace Risk

“Embrace risk and stop worrying about the consequences.
On your death bed, it’s too late.”

This is the first of Five Steps to a Better You in 2020 written by Steve Miller, a hypnotherapist that I follow on Facebook from Birmingham in the UK.  There are risks in staying within your comfort zone when it comes to daily life. The days will blend into weeks, which in turn blend into months of bland “beigeness” and before you know it another year has drifted past and all you have are monotone memories of another year gone by.

Embrace Risk

Can you remember back to a time when you were a child and you did embrace risk? Perhaps it was when you were learning to ride a bicycle. I can clearly remember that moment. I was playing with a friend in the small village we lived in. I was on my friend’s bicycle. My friend’s father was holding the seat and running behind me….. and then he wasn’t. But I didn’t care – I was moving along by myself.  I wasn’t worrying about the consequences of falling off – which I eventually did because I didn’t know how to stop.

Can you remember the frisson of excitement in your tummy when you did something new? That fluttering feeling of excitement, which is so often mistaken for anxiety when we start to get into our head space rather than our feeling space.

To embrace risk is to trust yourself and your inner strengths. Sometimes you need a little shove in the right direction, a little kick up the arse to get the momentum going, but when you do embrace risk – and it can be a calculated risk – then you are more likely to have no regrets on your death bed. Which reminds me of one of my favourite songs…..

 

Emotional Intelligence

Strengths and VulnerabilitiesIt is accepted that IQ – the Intelligence Quotient – is fixed. You either have it or not. But Emotional Intelligence can be learned and that is why it is important to differentiate between an inherent weakness and vulnerability. To diverge slightly…. when I was training to become a homeopath, we learned that if you remove the cause (eg: poor sanitation) then health outcomes improve. When there are lifestyle changes made: such as choosing healthy foods, one’s vulnerability to poor health or disease is lessened.  Likewise with Emotional Intelligence Coaching: if you identify the vulnerability and remove or change the contributing factors, the possibilities are endless. There may be some adjustments to be made – both in mindset and in the physical body and it is similar to the aches and pains felt after starting a new workout at the gym as the muscles get stretched and adjust to new levels of fitness.

In my search for Emotional Intelligence related meanings I came across an article  that described four types of vulnerability:

  • Physical
  • Economic
  • Social
  • Attitudinal.

For instance, the dictionary definition of vulnerability states that there is “a capability or susceptibility to being wounded or hurt” which implies that it is a possibility, not necessarily a given that something will happen. Whereas weakness in one definition that I came across,  is portrayed as “a disadvantage or fault” often of character or a lack of determination.

Emotional Intelligence is not only being aware of your own emotional responses to a myriad of situations, but also being cognizant of the emotions of those around you. It’s how you manage your behavior, how optimistic or resilient you are and how you manage your stress. In your relationships, whether they are personal, social or business – it’s about how you communicate, manage conflict, build team bonds or inspire others to lead.

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